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I really felt the need to share this with all. These valuable lessons in life are for anyone even if they are not just starting out. I hope it gives you something to think about.

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Yesterday, I focused on tips that help you reduce stress; because it can affect you reaching and achieving your goals. For the next few weeks I’m going to explore these tips, techniques and their benefits. The first is meditation.

Meditation is a practice that when many hear mentioned they may feel it’s for sick, overwhelmed and or alternative peoples; but, not them. Still many do not realize that Meditation can be an integral part in you in establishing and reaching your goals. Why?

• It helps you discover you. You have time to think about yourself. Experience yourself and your thoughts in a way you may never have been able to.
• You outlook becomes more positive. Meditation reduces anxiety and makes life become less overwhelming; because, “You Stop Sweating the Small Stuff.” The reason, the quiet time gives the brain respite from always working.
• You can focus and concentrate more. It is a fact that the practice of meditation can improve a person’s concentration skills.

Though there are many more benefits these are a few specific points, why you should Meditate for stress and to improve the possibilities of realizing your goals. When you consider just sitting quite and breathing 5- 10 a day can make you successful, why not learn the techniques of Meditation. The benefits far outweigh the time Meditating.

Blog Links:

• Lady Thrills.com
• Exotic Exercises
• She finds
• Bodysense blog

Webpage Links:

• http://www.meditationworkshop.org/benefits_meditation
• http://www.how-to-meditate.org/
• http://www.healthandyoga.com/html/meditation/objectives.html
• http://www.lorinroche.com/page4/page4.html

Stress can hold you back. This time of year can be difficult. Many women start stressing out because they find themselves slacking on their New Year’s resolutions. Valentines Day can also be a let down even if we have a partner because expectations may not be realistic. Jobs pressures may be setting in since the holiday season has ended and companies are focusing in on achieving their goals for the year.

What do you do about these stressors and other things creating anxiety?

Manage it. Why?

Stress can:

• make you fat
• cause illness
• trigger depression
• make you have a negative view of things around you

and more.

That’s why I’m writing10 tips to help you manage your stress.

1. Meditate – Just sitting quietly for 5- 15 minutes focusing on your breathing could be like a mini vacation every day
2. Get Active – Take a walk. It doesn’t have to be long, just 15 – 20 minutes a day will release endorphins that will make you fee better and improve your mood.
3. Talk to your friends – Identify your table of six and communicate with them. You need their support. If you don’t have them, make them.
4. Journal – Just writing your thoughts, frustrations or accomplishments will make you feel better. But, writing a “to-do list,” wish list or goal check-in list can also validate your inner voice.
5. Take time for yourself – Many women get so caught up in other people agendas including love ones they forget to take time for themselves as they did when they were younger. Relax, go to a movie, get your nails done, and keep that hair appointment. It makes a difference.
6. Help someone. It’s a fact volunteering improves you mood and the quality of your life.
7. Just say “No.” Having boundaries, both personally and professionally are important.
8. Compromise. It’s not always about you being right. Take a beat, the Win-Win is better.
9. Get a hobby. Hobbies are a way to escape, have fun, and feel a since of accomplishment.
10. Get professional help. Remember, there is nothing wrong for taking aspirin for a headache or putting a bandage on a cut. Therapy both alternative and traditional along with medication if necessary can really improve the quality of your life and your outlook on it.

It seems like a long list; but, just try implementing one of these tips a day; a week or a month and you will see your stress level decrease. You will also see your personal and professional outlook can change and you start realizing the success you are looking for.

Don’t let stress hold you back from living your best life.

Links to:

Articles

• Stress Buster
• Women’s Health: Stress Managing Tips
• Top 10 Stress Relievers – Article on great Hobbies for Stress Relief
• What Types Of Hobbies Are For You? – Quiz

Organizations

• National Mental Health Consumers’ Self-Help Clearinghouse
• American Institute of Stress
• American Psychological Association
• National Mental Health Association

I always want my clients to explore the possibilities. Often I hear; how can I? Well you can and Vocation Vacation is giving NY’ers a chance to experience Vocation Vacations for free. They are having a contest, launching a national Vocationing Club and New York City is where they will be kicking things off.
 

They will provide the five NYC-area Vocation Vacations listed below to five, to 5 lucky New York-area individuals as a gift for being part of their inaugural Vocationing Club. I really want to encourage all to enter this contest by writing a 250 word essay sent in the email text or in a separate, attached word document with a note that states which of the five Vocation Vacations you are most interested in and why. You must also include:

• Your name
• Address
• Email
• phone numbers
• and a brief title and/or description of what you currently do for a living today.

To vocationingclub@vocationvacations.com. Submissions will be accepted through December 31, 2007 and and/or forward this blog to friends. You must fit a certain criteria to qualify and be selected to become an inaugural member of Vocation Vacation. Please click here to find out what they are and find out what you will also receive if you are selected.
The five free Vocation Vacations available are:

• Animation TV Producer with Little Airplane Productions
• Baker with One Girl Cookies
• Comedian with Dan Nainan
• Fashion Buyer/Retailer with Global Purchasing
• Photographer with Teri Bloom

Vocationing Club inaugural members, will meet for breakfast once a week for eight weeks, starting Tuesday, January 21^st in a midtown diner at 7 AM and team-up with four other Vocationing Club members and together, you will experience the eight steps of the Vocationing process as laid out in Brian Kurth’s new book, TEST-DRIVE YOUR DREAM JOB (Hachette Group USA, January 2008.

Vocation Vacation is offering a wonderful opportunity for all individuals in NYC to discover a new vocation in a safe supportive environment. To find out more information on the contest and how to enter click here.

I met a young man, who I felt was a farmer, who harvested success, yesterday in New York City on the Upper Eastside.  Why was that important, because, he was an entrepreneur growing winner who achieve.  He is a mentor and runs a program for young people that had a lot of constraints; but, he found a way to mentor young people in spite of the obstacles.  His friends stand in line to help him. Why because he is a problem solver, mentor and a superstar and he doesn’t let obstacle keep him from being a success. 

Why do I write about this?  Many of us can learn from this young person.  Obstacles are created in your head.  Yes, he is young and he can fail and he has a huge future ahead of him; but, he doesn’t dwell on what he can’t do, he only focuses on what he can.  Because of this obstacles disappear and doors fly open.  

The lesson I’d like my clients to learn is the next time you focus on what’s going wrong, ask yourself what:

• You want to do?
• Is working?
• You can do?
• You need to do?

I’m not saying don’t focus on any problems; but, remember the Serenity prayer 

Serenity

GOD, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change

Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference.

Living ONE DAY AT A TIME; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.

Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it.

Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy in this life, and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.

Amen                   
By Reinhold Neibuhr

This prayer will remind you to embrace the things that you can change, not to focus on the things you can’t alter, at least not right now and focus on the positive. You will be happier; less stressed and have more success in the end

It’s starting to get to that time of year where I recommend to all of my clients to get reconnect. This is especially important, when we are working on goals. I recommend reaching out to individuals who can support you in your journey and also it is important for your mental health. But before you do this via email, review your email and where it comes from.

Often I notice that many of my clients use their current work email as their contact email. Why is this a problem? When connecting with personal friends, topics may come up that you may not want your employer to know about. Remember that all email correspondence is technically property of your employer. The other issue I’ve noticed, cutesy emails. What’s cutesy: sexybabydoll, momat21, hotlover, etc. Why is this a problem? Would you want a prospective employer to see you as a hotlover? Would you feel comfortable having an email being referred to a decision maker from hotlover?So, take the time out, to get an email that is professional. Use your initials, birthday, etc. It’s not only about connecting; but it’s also about, being taken seriously.

Other Links:

• Job Seekers Beware! – Choosing Email Names Wisely

I was watching the Today show when the question was asked, “Who’s Happier, Men or Women?” There was a study done by the Wharton School of Business that show that men are 90 minutes happier a day than women. Surprised? I was.

Why is this happening? It appears we (women) have more on our plates than we did 30 years ago; but, we try to do it all. Well, Karyn White’s, “Superwoman” was out in the 80’s and we didn’t listen to her. How are we now to remedy this struggle. Well, the report was a start. We have to be honest. I’m very happy that women were honest, as a woman and a coach. It is the first step to being happier. Therefore if you follow these five (5) steps you should start having more happier moments in your day.

• Acknowledge – You have to acknowledge that you aren’t happy; but, you want to be.
• Prioritize – You can’t do everything so try to do what’s most important to you.
• Let go – No one’s perfect. But, trying to be and not embracing challenges and failure as a positive and not an obstacle prevents the growth, learning and the joy of success.
• Change – Only you have the power to change your life. If you need to play more, love more, clean more, etc. “do it” but don’t forget to ask for help and support. Friends, family, colleagues, etc. are a great beginning; but, babysitters, housekeepers, therapist, trainers, coaches, etc., are another.

Be happy – Many women are miserable because they have forgotten what joy is. Smile a little more at others, count your blessings, and laugh at yourself. It’s a fact that all of these can improve your mood, increase the possibilities of success, and how others perceive you. In the end, it’s about knowing what’s important to you, owning you life and its challenges, asking for help when needed, and deciding you want to enjoy your life more. It may be tough at first; but, in the end, it’s worth it.

Other Links:

• Study Finds Men Are Happier Than Women
• Thank You Power: Making the Science of Gratitude Work for You by Deborah Norville
• The Happiness System for Women by Alexandra Watson

After Labor Day this year, I was watching a news story that stated Labor Day was the beginning of the New Year.  It discussed how many consider Labor Day the beginning of their year.  I also agree.  Why?  Summer ends, schools starts and the 4^th quarter begins.  Also, this is when many companies start evaluating what they’ve accomplished this year and start developing their new business strategies.  Why shouldn’t you? 

October is an excellent time for you to be proactive and evaluate your life and career.  How do you do this?  Ask yourself these 10 questions:

• Do you like what, you’re doing? 
• What are the things you have accomplished personally, professionally and spiritually? 
• Have you reach the goals you set for yourself last year? 
• Have you reached the goals your organization set for you? Spiritual home suggest? Or you made in your business? 
• How have you contributed to your business, spiritual home or the organization you worked for? 
• How has your life changed this year? 
• Do you feel as if you are a valued personally or professionally?  
• Do you feel you are beginning compensated adequately, rewarded or feel fulfilled personally, professionally, and spiritually? 
• Is your career path on track?  

Is your life path on track?Why am I asking you to ask yourself these questions?  If you work for an organization, it could be doing the same thing right now.  If you run your own business you should definitely be asking yourself these questions.  Why?  It’s the 4 quarter and companies are preparing for bonuses, promotions or lay-offs.  Business strategies are being set in organizations, businesses and even spiritual houses based on these factors.

Finally, if you don’t know your own value, you may be out of step with how people see you both personally and professionally.  Because of this, take a good look at your life and set 10 goals you want to accomplish, personally, professionally and spiritually. What you will realize once you start managing your life effectively and realizing you play a role in what works and doesn’t work in your life, you will become a success.   

Interesting Links

• The ends and beginnings of Labor Day
• Beat the burnout
• Faith+Values: Pews fill again as summer winds down
  

I have had many clients discuss with me as a coach, what is working and what is not working.  I often I hear “IT’S NOT FAIR!!!”  I’m not surprised that my clients or anyone feels this way; but, what does surprise me is that it creates obstacles that keep the individuals from getting what they want and need.  However, that is a challenge that must be overcome to get what you want in your life.  

I’ve discovered 6 simple steps to change this.

1. Laugh – Ask yourself, do I have any control over the situation.  If you don’t, humor is a great way to start healing and move forward.
2. Prioritize – Ask yourself is this important to you in your goals.  Why do you consider it a setback if it really isn’t that important and just hurts your feelings? (pride) Most of the things that set us back aren’t really needed by us anyway that are projected on us and we let them stick.
3. Create Plan – Many wait for something to happen to them.  Thinking if you’re in the right place at the right time, you will get what you want.  But, sometimes there’s even a plan for that.  If you assess your situation, and create a plan, life can become more manageable and the challenge can be conquered.
4. Find a sponsor, mentor or champion who supports you.  When you’re in a group and make the wrong choice, that’s bad.  However, it’s not uncommon. It’s called “group think.”  But, support can also be positive and give you the courage to do what you need and should do.
5. Focus on what’s working.  When things are not fair and you fixate on the negative and let it stop you, it lets the other guy win. When you focus on what’s working for you, even when you are having challenges, you normally can find a solution.
6. Take action.  If you don’t try, nothing will ever happen.  Remember, even if you fail, you did something and if you choose to, you learn from the process.

Try these steps.  They are just a start.  You’ll be amazed if you use these steps and look at life with humor, your life can really turn around rather quickly.