Archive for the 'Single Women' Category

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Single? Baby? Relationship? Choice.

Are you single?  Looking for a relationship?  Hoping to finally have a baby?  You have a choice. 

This is an issue many single women have wrestled with for years.  However, it becomes more pressing as many move into their mid thirties.  But, why are they wrestling?  You do have a choice. 

Ask yourself, do I really want to have a child?  That is the first question I ask women to answer.  It’s O.K. if you don’t want to be a parent.  But, if you do; ask yourself these questions.

1.       Why are you waiting? 

2.       Is it because your partner is not ready?

3.       Are you still looking for a partner, to parent with? 

4.       Are you ready to become a parent; 
           (but, don’t know where to start?)

5.       Are your finances unstable? 

6.       Are you overcommitted already and can’t find time for a child? 

7.       Are you afraid going at it alone? 

8.       Are you afraid that your lifestyle may change? 

9.       Are you confused at the choices to have to become a parent?

10.     Do you feel you have time?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, it might be time to get more information.  Why?  Because fertility peaks at 27; however, declines more severely after 40.  Yes, technology has made it easier to have a baby; but, find out where you are reproductively.  You can do this by asking your doctor for a blood test. 

As a coach, many of my clients have on their top 10 goals; get married have a baby as goals.  These are great.  Still, many are not educated to their timeline, when it comes to the latter, their fertility.  That is the reason this is a blog.  We all have choices.   As women, we must research and get information on this goal, as we would when trying to achieve any goal?  Why?  So we can have realistic expectations about our choices and the consequences are the ones that we can live with.

Informational links:

http://www.theafa.org

http://www.choosingsinglemotherhood.com/

http://mattes.home.pipeline.com/

Articles on Single Motherhood

http://www.tcdailyplanet.net/node/1707

http://singlemothers.org/SMO/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=38

http://momstoday.com/resources/articles/singlemom.htm

http://www.searchmothers.com/mothers/single_mothers.php

Books

http://www.amazon.com/Single-Mothers-Choice-Considering-Motherhood/dp/0812922468

News Video

Choice Moms

http://video.msn.com/v/us/msnbc.htm?g=efbb983e-56c6-4b95-b752-5c549612dc42&f=00&fg=copy

This morning, I was reading an editorial from “The Seattle Times,” suggesting, this year, single women are the “must get” voters.  Yeah!!! That’s great. It’s finally been acknowledge, in the print and television Medias that unmarried women are an important group to consider in elections.  Why?  They are a diverse group of approximately 47 million women, young, old, widowed and divorce; but many have something in common.  They have become “one of the fastest growing demographics;” who often doesn’t vote.  Did you know that 20 million unmarried women didn’t vote in 2004?  Wow!!!

“Women’s Voices Women Vote,” (WVWV) has focused on this issue.  They have a cool video with many female celebrities discussing voting.  Check out “The League of Women Voters” website, too.  Also, if you know the candidates in your communities, search the internet, for their websites, blogs and “Myspace” accounts to find out more about them and their platforms.  Yes, I said “Myspace.”  You don’t have to be under-30 to have an account.  Many politicians have their own “Myspace” pages, like Barack Obama, the Senator from Illinois and Dave Upthegrove, the State Representative from Washington.  Remember, these organizations and websites are great resources to use.  

Why would I discuss voting on 4The Perfect Fit’s blog?  As a life coach, I always suggest to my clients, it’s important for single women, to become proactive in making decisions that can effect their lives. They can do this by looking at their choices and deciding which consequences they can live with.  Why? Choice can be very empowering. 

Do you think that the elected officials in your community can effect your life?  Yes! No! Maybe!  Ok, you may be disappointed by the results; but, that’s OK.  Remember failure is good.  You grow from it.  It gives you perspective.  Also, keep in mind, your vote makes your voice heard.  Isn’t it great goal to express your opinion by voting?  It also makes you a part of a community; i.e. a network of people with similar ideas and interest.  Don’t forget the next Election Day is Tuesday, November 7, 2006.  There’s still time to register in some states, if you haven’t already.