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Is Friendship Harder After 35?

Friendship may or may not be harder after 35; however, the world we live in doesn’t make it happen as organically as it did when we were younger or even twenty years ago.  So it may take some work to make and maintain friendships.  I recommend you try to have 5 friends.  Why five?  If you have 5 friends you will have a table of 6 including yourself, the perfect number for a gathering.  So here are 4 tips to get you started filling your table of six:

  1. Know what you want from a friend.  That is the role you expect them to fill.  Consider this, you may be the mentor or nurturer friend for others; but, you may need a friend who reciprocates this role for you.  Some examples of friends are the:
    1. mentor 
    2. nurturer
    3. activity buddy
    4. confidant
    5. work buddy
    6. old friendetc.  There are many types of friends so don’t let yourself be locked into these examples.  However, try to find 5 different types of friends for your inner circle.  They really help make your life more complete.
       

  2. Develop an approach – Take making and managing friendships as seriously as you would your romantic relationship.  Get out; meet people at book readings, activity groups like the ones on meetups.com, and social events like, coffee chats, parties and fundraisers.

  3. Get Moving – I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again.  Don’t wait for an invitation.  Make them.  And, don’t settle on friendships that aren’t functioning well.  You don’t have to break up; but, manage them and build friendships that are working.

  4. Manage your friendships – Friendships change.  Manage them effectively and they will be wonderful for your health, support and wellbeing.  People may move in an out of your inner circle because of many different reasons.  However, if you deal with them in an effective way the relationship will become win – win. 

Don’t forget; give friendships a chance to bloom.  Sometimes it takes more than one contact for a relationship to develop.  Also, communication is very import; most women have exceptional verbal skills; but, listening skills are the hardest to master.  Let me know how it’s going.  Remember, it’s an ongoing process.

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One Response to “Is Friendship Harder After 35?”

  1. [...] Talk to your friends – Identify your table of six and communicate with them. You need their support.  If you don’t have them, make them. [...]

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